Dickie Dunn here, Yeah, yeah I know it’s been a long time. But some of us have day jobs. Think of me as that wacky Uncle who did a stretch in Joliet for doing 110 on the highway while the news helicopter got it all on tape. Only I got out early because I agreed to teach math to some lifers. Moving on…
So let’s do a quick exercise and see how much stuff has happened since I posted. The only rule is I can’t use Google to jog my memory. Ok, let’s begin. The Lions stunk out the joint so bad they set a new low in bad. The Cardinals turned out to be good. The Wolverines were worse than I thought. A-Rod, the last great hope of the purists, was on juice just like Clemens, Pettit and Tejada. McNabb sucked, then he was good, then he sucked again and now I’m sure where we stand.
Oh yeah the economy sucks worse than it did that movie “Gung Ho” from the 80’s. Don’t think Michael Keaton can save Hadleyville this time though. Las Vegas is in rough shape too. I guess you can’t keep building 3 billion dollar hotels and expect people pay $400 a night anymore. I haven’t been in Vegas since August, and it wasn’t all that great there then. I haven’t yet had a chance to blog about my annual Vegas Trip so, here you go.
Rolled up Aces over Kings, check raising stupid tourists, taking huge pots off them.
My buddies and I have been going to Vegas for a guys trip since sometime around 2000. I mostly a craps player some sports betting, and Black Jack. You couldn’t pay me to play the slots or Keno. I’ve never really been a Poker player. Well maybe some video poker but that’s about it. But ever since some accountant from the Midwest won the World Series of Poker everyone thinks they have the chops to bluff out a Poker Pro. Phrases like on-tilt, trips, short stack, nuts, on the button have become everyday terms. The Pros that live in Vegas are ok with it because for every Chris Moneymaker, there are a thousand people who leave Vegas with lighter pockets and bragging about how they “almost” took out a pro. The late night big stack tournaments are like their own personal ATM’s. It’s mainly for that reason that I stayed away from the Poker rooms. I just didn’t want to be the guy leaving Vegas long on stories and short on cash. This past August my buddies talked me into entering a tournament. The next three paragraphs is a brief synopsis on how the tourney went. We got into Vegas about 6 pm. Checked into our hotel and started enjoying everything Vegas has to offer. We were staying at the Palazzo, which is a super nice hotel and everything in the rooms was brand new. MY only complaints about the Palazzo would be that A. The sports book is about the size of a airplane bathroom and B. every table was a $25 minimum bet.
Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker.
So we were trying to figure out a place to make our fortune as it were. After a couple of false starts, we ended up at the Sahara for their 11pm no-limit Texas hold em tournament. Not exactly Teddy KGB’s place, but it isn’t the basement of the Country Club either. It was a $40 buy-in with a $25 add on. I have to admit I was a bit nervous as this was my first ever Poker tournament. My first table had the makings of a good crew. A few old ladies hoping to hang around long enough to get a comped breakfast buffet. A few younger guys who looked like they spent days picking out their shades. The guy to my right was anal about his coffee, that if I touched the cart he used to hold it he asked for a fresh cup. In the end, I guess I did what everyone else would do, order a Crown and coke and get focused. Next thing I know, it’s “Shuffle up and deal!” time. I play a little aggressive win a few pots make some stupid bets. I even had to use the add-on option.. But slowly but surely I build my stack, knock out a few old dudes who look like they were there when Buffalo Bill got Aces and Eights. A couple of British guys who were upset they didn’t call me when I was bluffing and walked into some full boats when I wasn’t. Moving on
Then, some weird stuff started happening, I started getting some good hands, Bluffed at just the right time, and kind started get a bit of a swagger. Which seemed odd since this was my first tournament.
Hey kid, did you have the spades? Sorry, Johnny, I Don't remember.
It’s about 4am and I’m sitting with two other people both of which are short stacked against me. I busted out the Dutchman. (I say that because he was from Holland, nothing derogatory.) So now’s it’s heads up with me and some old guy who looked like one of the Duke brothers from trading places, not sure if he was more Randolph or Mortimer.
Ok, now we’re heads up and he looks me dead in the eye and says, “I should warn you, I’m the best heads up Poker player in Vegas.” Dead serious look on his face I should add. So imagine his surprise when three hands later I follow him all in with 8-7 in my hand and the flop is 7-7-8. He’s out and I’m the winner of 11pm Sahara Tournament. (A highly prestigious honor I know.) I look over and I deadpan.. “Looks like you’re the second best heads up player in Vegas. But, don’t worry I’m going home on Monday” End of story.
Trying to capture the spirit of the thing, Dickie Dunn
