Not even Bikini girl can save Idol.

Dickie Dunn here, with some quick commentary.
look like the economy is picking up. Either that or the gov't pushed so much cash into the system that we haven't seen this much Cash flying around since Javon Walker and Floyd Mayweather Jr had a "make it rain" contest at that strip club in Vegas. A short while later Javon was found laying in the street with the snot kicked out of him. So keep that in mind when you're making investments.
Economic commentary isn't why I broke my long silence. It's this:

How much longer can American Idol last?

Hasn't this show run it's course? remember when only the winner got a record deal? Now you just have to make top ten and you're available for download 24 hours after you get booted. Well, except for Sanjaya...but he sucked harder than Carl Lewis trying to sing the national anthem.
But seriously, hasn't their target demographic aged out of that show. I look at myself. First season, didn't watch. Second season, my then girlfriend and current wife, liked it so I watched and we pretty much watched every episode since then. Now we're in season 8 and I hardly watch. Maybe a couple times on tivo. I don't even think my wife voted this year, I didn't even bother to ask. What's happened you say? Well, I got married and my wife pushed out a couple of shorties and now instead of sitting down at 8pm to watch Seacrest and Simon flirt with each other, I'm giving kids baths or picking up Elmo crap. We try to watch it on Tivo but it's not the same and so here we are. I have to think I'm not alone. Has their core audience grown up and evolved past the show? I mean all those high school sophomores probably still watch. But I don't think corporate sponsors like Ford and Coke are targeting people who don't drive yet. In this age of belt tightening with marketing dollars getting whacked like a fat Italian in a bad mob movie, you gotta wonder. Don't even get me started on Kara " I'm just trying to find out who you are as an Artist" Diaguardi. How long did Starsearch last? Every good idea runs it's course. Like pegged jeans and those baggy pants that Hammer used to wear. Stay tuned, Dickie Dunn out.

Fresh off the World Tour.....

Dickie Dunn here, Yeah, yeah I know it’s been a long time. But some of us have day jobs. Think of me as that wacky Uncle who did a stretch in Joliet for doing 110 on the highway while the news helicopter got it all on tape. Only I got out early because I agreed to teach math to some lifers. Moving on…
So let’s do a quick exercise and see how much stuff has happened since I posted. The only rule is I can’t use Google to jog my memory. Ok, let’s begin. The Lions stunk out the joint so bad they set a new low in bad. The Cardinals turned out to be good. The Wolverines were worse than I thought. A-Rod, the last great hope of the purists, was on juice just like Clemens, Pettit and Tejada. McNabb sucked, then he was good, then he sucked again and now I’m sure where we stand.
Oh yeah the economy sucks worse than it did that movie “Gung Ho” from the 80’s. Don’t think Michael Keaton can save Hadleyville this time though. Las Vegas is in rough shape too. I guess you can’t keep building 3 billion dollar hotels and expect people pay $400 a night anymore. I haven’t been in Vegas since August, and it wasn’t all that great there then. I haven’t yet had a chance to blog about my annual Vegas Trip so, here you go.

Rolled up Aces over Kings, check raising stupid tourists, taking huge pots off them.

My buddies and I have been going to Vegas for a guys trip since sometime around 2000. I mostly a craps player some sports betting, and Black Jack. You couldn’t pay me to play the slots or Keno. I’ve never really been a Poker player. Well maybe some video poker but that’s about it. But ever since some accountant from the Midwest won the World Series of Poker everyone thinks they have the chops to bluff out a Poker Pro. Phrases like on-tilt, trips, short stack, nuts, on the button have become everyday terms. The Pros that live in Vegas are ok with it because for every Chris Moneymaker, there are a thousand people who leave Vegas with lighter pockets and bragging about how they “almost” took out a pro. The late night big stack tournaments are like their own personal ATM’s. It’s mainly for that reason that I stayed away from the Poker rooms. I just didn’t want to be the guy leaving Vegas long on stories and short on cash. This past August my buddies talked me into entering a tournament. The next three paragraphs is a brief synopsis on how the tourney went. We got into Vegas about 6 pm. Checked into our hotel and started enjoying everything Vegas has to offer. We were staying at the Palazzo, which is a super nice hotel and everything in the rooms was brand new. MY only complaints about the Palazzo would be that A. The sports book is about the size of a airplane bathroom and B. every table was a $25 minimum bet.

Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker.

So we were trying to figure out a place to make our fortune as it were. After a couple of false starts, we ended up at the Sahara for their 11pm no-limit Texas hold em tournament. Not exactly Teddy KGB’s place, but it isn’t the basement of the Country Club either. It was a $40 buy-in with a $25 add on. I have to admit I was a bit nervous as this was my first ever Poker tournament. My first table had the makings of a good crew. A few old ladies hoping to hang around long enough to get a comped breakfast buffet. A few younger guys who looked like they spent days picking out their shades. The guy to my right was anal about his coffee, that if I touched the cart he used to hold it he asked for a fresh cup. In the end, I guess I did what everyone else would do, order a Crown and coke and get focused. Next thing I know, it’s “Shuffle up and deal!” time. I play a little aggressive win a few pots make some stupid bets. I even had to use the add-on option.. But slowly but surely I build my stack, knock out a few old dudes who look like they were there when Buffalo Bill got Aces and Eights. A couple of British guys who were upset they didn’t call me when I was bluffing and walked into some full boats when I wasn’t. Moving on
Then, some weird stuff started happening, I started getting some good hands, Bluffed at just the right time, and kind started get a bit of a swagger. Which seemed odd since this was my first tournament.


Hey kid, did you have the spades? Sorry, Johnny, I Don't remember.

It’s about 4am and I’m sitting with two other people both of which are short stacked against me. I busted out the Dutchman. (I say that because he was from Holland, nothing derogatory.) So now’s it’s heads up with me and some old guy who looked like one of the Duke brothers from trading places, not sure if he was more Randolph or Mortimer.
Ok, now we’re heads up and he looks me dead in the eye and says, “I should warn you, I’m the best heads up Poker player in Vegas.” Dead serious look on his face I should add. So imagine his surprise when three hands later I follow him all in with 8-7 in my hand and the flop is 7-7-8. He’s out and I’m the winner of 11pm Sahara Tournament. (A highly prestigious honor I know.) I look over and I deadpan.. “Looks like you’re the second best heads up player in Vegas. But, don’t worry I’m going home on Monday” End of story.

Trying to capture the spirit of the thing, Dickie Dunn

Week 13 Picks- Wed Special

Dickie Dunn here to handicap the three Thanksgiving day games for you. But first, some food for thought to help you decide on strategy for bingefest that is Thanksgiving. Don't load up on Mashed Potatoes or Stuffing. They are integral parts of your plate to be sure but best kept in a supporting role. Similar to Vince Vaughn. Save plenty of room for your Turkey, always grab an extra piece of white meat you can snack on while you're waiting for the rest of the goodies to come around the table. Keep an eye out for that special dish that someone makes only for the Turkey day occasion. At the house we're going to it's the sweet potatoes. But keep an eye out for mac and cheese. or hash brown casserole. I don't know exactly what that dish will be at your place but, you will and that's the point. Focus on the 6 or 7 things you know you'll like. Don't try to sample every item in the inventory you'll get too full too fast and won't truely enjoy the things that you like best. Last two things, any guy worth his salt can handle seconds and save the desserts table for halftime of the second game just when you body is adjusting to being so full. Keep all this info in mind and you'll have a great Thanksgiving. With that, onto the picks.




TEN at DET (+11)

This pains me but, I gotta go with the Titans here. Detroit just sucks too bad. Maybe you can get away with a DET first half bet. If I'd known that the my experience watching the Lions would peak with Reggie Ball and Mel Gray Jr. I would've paid closer attention in the early 90's.


SEA at DAL ( -12.5)


Lots of points here but I think the 'boys cover this one. How excited is Seattle to play in this game? on a scale of 1-10? I'd say about a 1.5, tops. Unless they're putting Leon Lett's jersey into ring of honor, take Dallas.


ARI at PHI ( -3)


It's never good to travel from the west coast to the east to play a game. and it's even worse to do it with a short week. Let's put this in perspective. The Cards played the late game on Sunday. Most teams usually get Monday off, then Tues, Wed to put in the game plan. Refine it on Thurs and Fri. Travel and/or do walkthrough on Sat. Play on Sunday. No off day on Monday. Tuesday to put in the game plan. Wednesday refine and travel. Thursday AM walkthrough, and play that night. Tight schedule to say the least. Not sure how they do it but I gotta take the Eagles. Unless they bench McNabb, then I took the Cards.


Have a Happy Holiday,
Dickie Dunn




If Dickie Dunn wrote it, it's gotta be true.

week 12 picks- with better Drinkability.

Dickie Dunn here,
There’s something missing this week. I’m usually all excited for the third Saturday in November. Fall has officially settled in, but winter is still hitting the snooze button. Thanksgiving is right around the corner and you can almost taste the Turkey and stuffing. But still, there’s something missing. Wait a minute! Isn’t it Michigan vs. Ohio State this weekend? That’s right, now I remember, the annual clash to see who gets to go to the Rose Bowl. Only this year a 3-8 Michigan team rolls into C-bus with it’s tail between it’s legs. Most UofM fans are just trying to get the season over with and look forward to Basketball?? no., Hockey?? nope., make that Women’s Gymnastics season. I can’t remember that last time one team was favored by 3 touchdowns in this game. Maybe Rico and the boys will look like a team one time this season and pull out a W, …..big maybe. Time will tell if Rick Rod is the guy for the Ann Arbor faithful, I’m inclined to press the reset button on this season and wait until he gets guys in there that fit his system. Prediction? OSU 38- Mich 10.


Onto the picks.

( I broke even last week, you’ll have to take my word for it as I was too busy to post. )


Thursday special

Take the Steelers to cover the 10.5. the Bengals only try hard against NFC East foes.



TENN -5 home against the JETS.

I think the Titans cover this one. I think Brett Favre throws a TAINT at the worst possible time and that’s how the Titans cover this one. Oh, and Chris Johnson and the guy who swallowed Lindale White combine to rush for over 200 yards.


DAL – 10.5 home against the Niners.

Lotta points to lay here but how can I take the Niners in any situation that doesn’t involve the Raiders or Rams. I think Romo gets the 'boys playing well enough to cover plus the good news about Adam Jones getting reinstated will really jumpstart the crowd. Kinda like when Reno Hightower came out wearing his white shoes in the second half of the big game against Bakersfield High. Well, except Reno was a washed up high school jock painting murals on vans for a living and Adam is a career malcontent with a penchant for strip clubs. Other than that, eerily similar.

Quick Side note: Is there a more inplausable movie that "The Best of Times" ? I played football in high school and of the 45 guys on my team, I have regular contact with two of them, I could probably tell you the wherabouts of maybe 3 more. Putting aside the idea of even getting this game off the ground, you mean to tell me that not only does Bakersfield get their starting twenty two together, They located the whole damn team? and all of them are in prime shape like they just finished 12 weeks at Parris Island. You gotta be kidding me. On the other hand it is Bakersfield, what else they got going on? It is the hometown of Buck Owens afterall.


Chi – 8.5 at StL.

The next time I take St Louis in anything. It’ll be on Jeopardy. As in, “I’ll take Crummy Football Teams for $ 200 Alex. What is St, Louis? I mean Chicago is inconsistent but at least they have a running game.

ATL -1 home against CAR.

One of two things is happening here. Either John Fox is trying to bring back the "three yards and a cloud dust” era or Jake Delhomme’s elbow isn't feeling all that great right now. Take a look at Jake’s stats the last few weeks and tell me he’s not hurt. Of course it could be that he sucks, in which case I need to drop him off my fantasy team. I wonder if Brady Quinn is still available. Take the Falcons.

Den – 9.5 home against OAK.

The worst thing that could have happened to the Broncos is playing the Raiders week one, they totally thought they were better then they were and it cost em. Losing 10 different running backs to injury probably hurt too I suppose. Now that they’ve won two in a row I’m going to have to start hearing Bronco fan making plans for Miami. Great.
Take the Broncos and pray for snow.

NYG -3 at ARI.

Something tells me AZ is gonna get slapped around a bit here. It’s like that scene in “Usual Suspects” where Kaiser Soze tells the cop. “… he showed those men of will what will really was.” Don’t get me wrong, I think AZ is good but the G-men are playing on a whole ‘nother level. There’s a little risk with the Kurt Warner revenge factor game. But, you’re only getting 3 points to go down that road. Lay the three and squeeze the cheeks.

Other games

CLE -3 over HOU (worst game of the year?)
BUF +3 over KC
NEP +1 over Miami
TAM – 8.5 over DET
BAL -1 over PHI
JAX – 2.5 over MIN
WAS -3.5 over SEA
IND +3 over SDC
GBP +2.5 over NOS. (in a Venison Etouffe Battle. )


Wally Solbchak update:
We got a Ransom note from Wally's captors but our policy is we don't negotiate with Terrorists. They've lowered their demands to a couple of Broncos tickets and some AppleBees gift Certificates but rules are rules. Wally would've wanted it this way. Yes we can !!

Week 10 picks are here- Now with Ginko Baloba!!

Making picks with two broken thumbs.


Dickie Dunn here, Here’s a quick joke for you. A degenerate gambler is going over the basketball lines with his bookie. Now the bookie almost feels bad for the guy since the degenerate has lost 14 basketball bets in a row. So he throws the guy a bone and says, “Hey you wanna know tonight’s Hockey lines?” “naah” says the bettor, “I don’t know anything about betting on Hockey.”….ouch, that smarts Now my picks for last week weren’t quite that bad, but they were close. Tread carefully and let’s hope you still have your house at the end of this week. In looking back on last week here’s a few mistakes I made. Tampa Bay sucks on the road, Buffalo just plain sucks and Houston really sucks. Detroit is one of those team just good enough to cover if the line gets too big, but not too actually win a game, and Dallas is so dysfunctional that only the ongoing Raiders debacle allows the Cowboys to keep under the radar. In fact even the Raiders can’t even be trusted to tank a season properly. In fact I haven’t seen a group this poorly led since Ken Lay was calling the shots at ENRON. It’s a good thing Al Davis isn’t alive to see what’s become of his Raiders.

Onto the picks. ( hang on to your c)*ks. )

Thursday Night special.

DEN +3 @ CLE


There’s nothing quite like a spotlight game to make your regular season debut. Brady Quinn goes under the lights to host the Broncos tonight and even though the Broncos play defense like they a plane to catch, they should be able to confuse him enough to eek one out.

TEN -3 @ CHI

The Titans are undefeated at 8-0. This feels like a 16-7 slug fest. Kind of like in Michael Jackson’s “Beat it” video where they tied the two guys hands together and they had a knife fight….except without all the gay undertones. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I’m just saying is all.

GBP +2.5 @ MIN

Let’s just say they’ll be a lot of brats consumed by people in red paid flannel this game. Although it is deer season so maybe the crowds will be a little lighter than usual. Everyone from Brainerd to Wausau will be watching this game. Well, assuming they have a TV at deer camp that is.

KC +15.5 @ SDC

Even Herm Edwards should be able to cover this spread. It’s not like the Chargers make any effort on defense. My buddy coaches a Pop Warner team and I bet they could run the ball on these guys. Let’s hope Herm realizes this fact. I mean assuming he hasn’t cleared out his office yet.

NYG -3 @ PHI

Dirty Harry said it best when he said “A man’s got to know his limitations”. I think Philly is a legit team then can win a lot of games but they have one fatal flaw. It’s that they never put teams away. It’s like the play calling gets way conservative when they get a lead. All of a sudden it Westbrook left, Westbrook right. QB draw. Punt. Playing not to lose is never a good recipe for success in the NFL. The Giants are one of those teams that can get up off the mat if they get knocked down. Let’s hope Philly remembers that this week, well not this week since I took the G-men minus the 3, but soon. Yeah soon is good.


Other game not worth writing about
NEP -4 over BUF
ATL – 1.5 over NOS
STL +9 over NYJ
MIA – 8.5 over SEA
JAC -6.5 over DET
OAK +9.5 over CAR
PIT minus whatever over IND
ARI – 9.5 over SFX
BAL -1 over HOU.


Those are the picks for this week. Maybe we’ll have a Wally Sobchak sighting this week. Vegas has the odds of him getting a post in this week at +150. Not looking good. Word on the street is, he had to go see the commissioner about violating the blog’s personal conduct policy and he’s going to serve a 3 week suspension. Tough break for Wally.
D.D.


If Dickie Dunn wrote it, it’s gotta be true,

week 9 picks- The Smell from the backseat was sumthin awful."

Dickie Dunn here.
Remember when the Griswold's hijacked Wally World or got busted? Roy Wally and Clark were talking about that trip to FL ? Roy curled his nose up at the thought of the smell coming from the back seat? I bet the backseat of that station wagon had nothing on the Saints locker room on drug testing day. What'd they have 3 guys busted for taking banned diuretics? My God. I'm getting woozy just thinkin about it. I took my lunch to work one time and forgot the tupperware container in my backseat for a week afterwards. I imagine the smell of cracking that baby open was comparable. Even Grady Jackson got busted. He got busted for performance enhancers. must have been in training to take on Joey Chestnutt at Nathan's next year. Is nothing Sacred?

Onto the picks...


Jacksonville - 8 over Cinci.

You could probably double this line and I'd still take the Jags. Cinci looks awful. I had Chris Perry in my fantasy league and dropped him after week 3. Actually that's not true I traded him, straight up for a box of old partially used rolls of athletic tape and a cassette tape of ZZ Top Eliminator. I stand by my decision.


St Louis +3 over Ariz.

Jim Haslett has the boys playing pretty well over the last few weeks. It's like Lou Brown said in Major League, "the veterans are starting to play back to form and the rookies are coming along faster than expected" Let's just hope they don't have a picture of a half naked Linehan in the locker room.

Ten -4 1/2 over Green Bay

I think the Titans are for real. Who knew Vince Young was the problem. I mean his stats were bad but they'd win right? At least that's what Vince's agent is saying. It's hard to say what career path VY's going to take. I mean is he the next Mike Vick? or Akili Smith?

* Editor's note, Dickie is referring to Mr Vick's play on the field and not his legal trouble. He's not implying in any way that Vince Young is involved in illegal dog fighting or anything of the sort.

Den - 3 1/2 over Miami.


No way the Broncos lose at home after two weeks off. Double edge sword for me here because Broncos fan always starts talking Super Bowl after every win so I guess I'm gonna have to hear it this week. As long as Jay Cutler can keep his Diabetes in check the Donkeys should win this one.



Dallas +8 1/2 over NYG.

No way Dallas should even be able to compete. The G-men should have too much on either side of the ball. BUT, 8 1/2 is a lot of points in an NFC East match up. and besides isn't Wade Phillips coaching for his job this week after the ole' kiss of death vote of confidence from Jerry Jones? That's like the death knell of any coach. I mean Hitler gave Poland's leaders a vote of confidence saying he wouldn't invade their country on Aug 23, 1939. Guess what happened one week later? Hitler invaded Poland. Let's just say Wade might want to start winning some games....soon


Pats +6 1/2 over the Colts

this game would be sweet if it was 2002. This game reminds of Evander Holyfield, he still looks like he can fight but man he doesn't slip the jab like he used to. Let's hope these guy can channel Toby Keith. "Not as good as they once was, but as good once as they ever were." Let's just hope no one gets hurt in this one.

Philly - 6 1/2 over Seattle.

You never know which Philly team is gonna show up. But I'm pretty sure you always know which Seattle team your getting week in and week out. Let's just say it ain't the '84 Niners. Take the Eagles in "party never stops" for Philly fans.



Other games I didn't expound upon.


Texans +4 1/2 over Minny
TB -9 over KC
Cle - 1 1/2 over Balt.
Chi - 12 1/2 over Det
Atl -3 over Oak
Skins - 2 1/2 over Pitt


Hopefully we get some pick from Wally this week, he's been out of town watching his ex-wifes schnauzer. Don't laugh it's a f(*kin show dog with f&*kin papers you don't board show dogs Dude. Dickie out.


If Dickie Dunn wrote it, it's gotta be true.

Week 8 NFL Picks---Hazardous Helmets and more.

Dickie Dunn here, with some week 8 picks for you. Per my customary routine, I’m going to ramble a bit before getting into this weeks picks. What did we learn from last week? We learned Buffalo could be legit, The Jets aren’t, and the Patriots can still play a little if you let them run the ball all day. Coincidentally that game unfolded exactly like I said it would which according to my stats makes me approx 1 out of 108 in correctly predicting how an NFL game will unfold. Not good I know but I still think I have better numbers than Boomer Esiason, Cris Carter, and Howie Long combined. And just think odds are you’ll only have to wait two months for me to do it again. Try to think of it as a Christmas present.
I know ESPN has tackled this subject already but I wanted to weigh in with my thoughts the marked increase in helmets flying off of players head’s this year. IT seems like it happens multiple times a game nowadays. Understand this, players in the NFL wear almost no padding these days other than shoulder pads and helmets. I seriously don’t think I’ve seen hip pads in 15 years. They do this to get faster obviously, and wants to let a little thing like having a ruptured spleen get in the way of speed. In High School and College, these pads are required. Safety being a little higher on the priority list at those levels. It appears the only thing required in the NFL is a helmet and shoulder pads. So to attempt a quick recap, you’ve got some of the biggest fastest athletes in the world colliding play after play with little or no padding? Ouch. Back to the Helmet issue. Many helmets have multiple snaps on either side of their chin straps. One on each temple and the other back by the player’s ear. You take a helmet off by snapping off the two by your ear and pulling the helmet off., and then reversing the action once you put it back on. Here’s the problem, owing to the fact that the chin strap is still supported by the two temple snaps, at times you can put the helmet on and feel it tight against your chin. So it can feel like it’s on when in reality it’s not. Not a huge problem if you’re standing on the sidelines checking out the cute blonde in section 128. But if you’re running into a ball carrier at 30 knots closure speed, you might want those extra buckles snapped up. So until they design a helmet with a different chin strap design, this will continue. Oh yeah, and having long hair under your helmet isn’t so good either. It not only compromises the overall fit of the helmet, it makes it more likely to come off. It’s only a matter of time until Steven Jackson (Rams), Tory Polamalu (Steelers) or the Cowboys’ Marion Barber breaks their nose from a vicious hit to the face.

Onto the picks….


RAVENS -7 over the RAIDERS


Another West coast team heading east and playing the early slot. You just know AL Davis ain’t springing for the Waterfront Marriott. With his Budget constraints, it’s looking more like the Pikesville Howard Johnson. Not good times, take the Ravens lay the 7.


BILLS -1 over MIAMI

The AFC East leading Bills head for warmer weather to take on the Dolphins. That’s right, AFC East leaders….letting it sink in. Back with me? Miami can’t seem to figure itself out just yet. Pack some sunscreen and take the Bills.

FALCONS +9.5 over EAGLES.

No one starts faster then the Eagles then fades in the second half. It’s like Any Reid turns into Fielding Yost after scoring a couple of TD’s. (Coach Yost used to punt on second or Third down as a defensive tactic. Needless to say the game has changed a little.) I think the Eagles win but it should be close.


RAMS +7.5 over PATRIOTS

Are the Rams that good or are the Cowboys that bad? The Redskins game?, you could say the skins kind of handed that game to em with all the turnovers. But Dallas? That game was painful to watch ever for guys with fantasy points on the line in that game. So I guess I’ll take those 7.5 points and pray. Besides who’s running the ball for New England? No Maroney, Lamont Jordan is banged and Sammy Morris is nursing a sore quad. So does that mean we’ve got Kevin Faulk and BenJarvis Green-Ellis carrying the rock for the Pats? Scary.


REDSKINS -7.5 over LIONS

The last time the Lions beat the Redskins Harry Truman was president and Night Train Lane was the quarterback for the Lions. I wonder if he’s available for this game. Take the ‘skins.


TEXANS -9 over BENGALS

This is the rescheduled Hurricane IKE game. I’m not sure how big this line would have to be to take the Bengals but its def. bigger than this. Good to see Marvin Lewis has that team headed in the right direction. Think Sam Wyche would be willing to come out of retirement?


Other Picks not worthy of special mention

SDC -3
NYJ – 13.5
DAL -2
CAR -4
JAX -7
NYG +3
SFX -5
TEN -4